Time Freezes

Well, another R&R day. I hate this whole time change, b/c I never gain an hour. I watched my phone time freeze at 1:04am for an hour. I was wide awake, even watched "Confessions of a Shopaholic" which ended at the new time 3am (but body time 4am). So I slept until what would have been 1pm today. Coughing and anxiety kept me awake. What was making me anxious you asked? I'm wondering if the pain in my breast is cancer that the doctors missed b/c they refused to do another ultra sound. I 'm thinking that someone is going to break into my apartment while I'm in bed. I worry about my brother-in-law in Afghanistan and my sister with the two kids and another one on the way. I'm worried that this cold that I've had for 3 weeks now is something else and that traveling for a week will only make me worse. I wonder what I'm going to get the family for Christmas and whether I should try getting a roommate or if I should move. I think about Erick in Denver, wondering if the flights will lower or if I should just go ahead and buy the tickets now. I'm afraid I'm going to lose my job. I worry that I have missed some credit card payment and ruin my credit. I think about why my apartment is slanted, so nothing is flat and leveled and why the floor makes this water tapping/dripping sound in my bedroom which annoys the hell out of me. Then I think about all the stuff I've accumulated here and what it would cost me to move it all. I fear coming home in a week and a half to an apartment that has been burglarized. I think of past relationships which make me angry, which increase my heart rate and therefore makes it impossible to fall asleep until I can calm myself down, which I do by thinking of Denver. But not until I think again about who I bought my mattress from and if there will ever come a time when I can lay on it and not think about that. Then I think of friendships, the ones I've made, the ones I've lost and the ones I never considered. Then I think of if I'm really happy where I am in life and wonder if I should be somewhere else, doing something different. Then, because I'm reading "The Help" wonder if the half baths or guest water closets stemmed from the whole separate but equal times with the help having to use a separate bathroom (and since an average family didn't have live-in help, there was no need for a shower, hence the half baths). But after a while, I decide it's been 4 hours since I took some cough medicine, so I could take some NyQuil to help me fall asleep. Now I just hope I didn't mess up my sleeping hours for tonight by staying in all day long, watching movies without getting dressed for the second day in the row, having not stepped outside since Friday. Oh, how I wish I could have benefited from the extra hour we gained last night or not eve have to deal with changing out clocks.

Burn Baby

Sleep. Eat. Watch TV. Eat. Do Laundry. Cook. Eggnog Latte. Watch TV. Burn my bare hip while cleaning my bathroom naked. That was my day in a nut shell. The only hot water pipe for the heater that does not have a foam protector on it is the one in the bathroom. So while I was sweeping before jumping in the tub, I bumped my hip (about 6 inches from my tush) on the freakin' hot pipe. Now, I have a good 5 inch burn mark that looks like it's already blistering. Yeah, I'm taking the foam off the pipe in the spare bedroom and putting it in the bathroom when the heat isn't on, because I'm NOT going to allow this to happen again. Yes, the words out of my mouth as I jumped up like I was belted was "mother effer!!" I can't promise I wont clean the bathroom naked in the future, but you damn well better believe that I'll be putting the foam protector on the damn pipe as soon as it cools down! Now I just need to make sure I don't burn myself on the spare bedroom pipe...that would be just my luck. Freakin' A! Oh, how I miss central heat!

My Stupid Mouth Has Got Me in Trouble

Not only is that part of a John Mayer song, but it's also how I feel today. I have been sick for over two weeks, sent home sick from work because the CoS thought I didn't look so good once, and took a sick day. It's a cold, plain and simple, but I feel shitty and am extremely irritable. I don't PMS (thank GOD!) but I imagine this is what many woman go through on a monthly basis. Of course, I haven't said anything that wasn't true, just the manner in which I type it (not "say" it b/c I can barely carry on a conversation without coughing or irritating my throat to the point I have to shut up). But whatever, this is how I get when I'm sick, so deal! Since I have been known to say too much and get myself in trouble, I'm listening to that John Mayer song...the song of my day and just going to do something I used to do back when MySpace was popular...tell you shit that you probably don't care about, but I enjoy sharing :)

1. What time did you get up this morning? I was out of bed at 8:15

2. How do you like your steak? whole, as in still on the cow who is grazing.

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? The Next Three Days

4. What are your favorite TV shows? NCIS, Private Practice, Dexter, TrueBlood

5. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be? Switzerland or Ireland

6. What did you have for breakfast? Chocolate chip cookie, oatmeal, tea a bagel and a muffin (over the course of 3 hours)

7. What is your favorite cuisine? Italian

8. What foods do you dislike? meat, eggs and most sea food

9. Favorite Place to Eat? my parent's house

10. Favorite salad dressings? depends on the salad, but Ranch and Pomegranate Walnut Vinaigrette

11.What kind of vehicle do you drive? I drive my family and friends cars whenever I visit

12. What are your favorite clothes? I'm a jeans and t-shirt kind of gal

13. Where would you visit if you had the chance? Where wouldn't I visit? If I had to choose it would be Antarctica... it's crazy expensive so it's gonna be a long while before I set food down there.

14. Cup 1/2 empty or 1/2 full? empty

15. Where would you want to retire? Ireland

16. Favorite time of day? twilight (since the actual time varies depending on season)

17. Where were you born? Upstate NY

18. What is your favorite sport to watch? Football

19. Bird watcher? only if they are building a nest or feeding their babies on our back patio back home, otherwise, no

20. Are you a morning person or a night person? hmm... I'm more like a day person especially when I have a hard time falling asleep and therefore have a hard time waking up early.

21. Pets? Not with me, but looking forward to seeing my baby and her hubby and "the cat who things she is a dog" when I go home for Christmas.

22. Any new and exciting news that you'd like to share? I might be going to Italy for free in the spring.

23. What did you want to be when you were little? a mom, a teacher, a zoologist, an oceanographer, interior decorator...well, at least I got the whole sitting at a desk part right.

24. What is your best childhood memory? Hmm, I have a lot of favorite memories of my adulthood, but hmm... maybe making oatmeal raisin cookies when it rained or watching Gilligan's Island and eating the 3-2-1 jello like stuff when I wasn't feeling well.

25. Are you a cat or dog person? cat, but for whatever reason dogs love me, even when I want nothing to do with them.

26. Are you married? nope, but if I had, I would have been divorced by now, so I'm glad I'm not married.

27. Always wear your seat belt? yes, though I am confused whenever I get into a cab b/c no one buckles up... so to not be dorky, when I used to ride in cabs I didn't. I guess I will next time I find myself in one, b/c they are crazy drivers here in Boston.

28. Been in a car accident? yes, one with a Boston cabby and when that guy ran me off the road on the 78, totaling my car (but the insurance company didn't total it, they just rebuilt it) oh and then when we were coming back from the Balloon and Wine festival in Temecula, a guy rear-ended us. Maybe there's more to this whole hating cars thing than I thought.

29. Any pet peeves? oh boy, this could take a while... when people say they will do something and then flake or come up with an excuse...drives me NUTS!

30. Favorite pizza topping? cheese and avocado

31. Favorite Flower? carnations

32. Favorite ice cream? chocolate malt crunch... oh how I miss it!

33. Favorite fast food restaurant. In-n-Out or Sonic b/c they have food I can eat.

34. How many times did you fail your driver's test? ugh, the driving part I failed my first time b/c a Rollerblade was in the crosswalk on the other side of the street.

35. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card? Not hard to do when target only gives me a $200 credit limit. But seriously, I'm not one to charge anything unless I have the money to pay it in full.

36. Do anything spontaneous lately? Like deciding to go to Denver in February for a vacation, I tend to be more of a planned spontaneity type of person.

37. What was your favorite vacation? Oh, I can't decide... been to too many places

38. Last person you went out to dinner with? I can't remember, Eve maybe... I've done more lunches than dinners lately and been dining in with friends.

39. What are you listening to right now? Well, was sick of listening to that John Mayer song, so now my humidifier and the noisy people in the building next to me.

40. What is your favorite color? blue...but many think it's green

41. How many tattoos do you have? 0, I have nothing important to write on my body

42. Coffee drinker? more like an addict... thanks Gibbs!

43. How many children do you have? 0 at the moment, but I am an Auntie of 4.33 kids.

Sent Home

So, another rainy day in Boston and I was sent home by the chief of staff b/c I look pale and still not feeling well. I was even wearing makeup, and am naturally pale, but I totally understand. I went home, took some NyQuil and went to bed for a couple hours before joining my movie buddy for a free showing of "The Next Three Days" (new Russell Crowe movie coming out in a couple weeks). It was awesome; kept me guessing. So, I took this photo while walking back from the theater's... Landmark Center all lit up (used to be a Sears building).

In other news, the decision was made for me. I am not joining my bowling team this season. Too much drama and conflict I have with some people, so I've decided to join a random team in hopes of making some new friends. Hopefully they will be better than my first experience with the bowling league (when it was just me and one teammate most of the time who showed, being the only 2 to show up and just bowled to bowl). It's funny how quick people are at jumping online to ask for another teammate before I gave my final word, but hey...lessons are to be learned. So, to make me feel better, I talked to Erick in Denver and will be buying my flight tickets to see him in February. He told me I could use his car while I'm there, so thanks to SW, it will cost me less than $200 for the flight and that's all I have to worry about! The first guy I ever truly loved and the one guy I can count on to always make me smile...just damn him for not being the long-term relationship type of guy. Now, I know what you are thinking, that I'm just setting myself up for disappointment...but this is the first time in over year I have done something for myself and it's going to make me feel so good spending time with someone who knows me, knew me before moving to Boston and will always have a part of my heart. It's giving me hope, making me feel those butterflies I haven't felt in over a year. I don't know a single guy here who would let me use his car, be a good host and make me feel like the luckiest girl in the city...so, I'm gonna hop on a plane to Denver, and escape reality for a few days. And you know what? I fell good!

Champagne, Cheese and Primary Care

A work photo of the cafe transformed for our Primary Care gift reception. Today we held a reception because an anonymous donor gave HMS a huge $30 million gift for a Center for Primary Care. What this meant for me? I was able to sleep in and get into work later so I could stay for the 2 hour reception. I was able to get in and snap this photo before the place got packed. We had light refreshments (cheese, crackers, fruit, and veggies) and I had a glass of wine and champagne. I must say, there were quite a few attractive guys in attendance, the residents or perhaps doctors who look like they could star on Private Practice or Grey's Anatomy. It was a good turn out as the Dean of HMS, the President of Harvard, other Dean's who played a large role in making this happen and some new physicians who helped bring attention to the importance of primary care. It was fun to, especially now that I know more people from different departments. Primary care is important and yet it's one of the least desirable medical professions. How many of you ask around for a good primary care physician? Long hours, less pay than other medical specialties... while HMS can't change the world, at least it's a step in the right direction when it comes to changing health care...primary care is important to each and every one of us.

Place Matters

Every now and then I see a poster/advertisement on the T or in the station that makes me think. Like this one here at the Copley Outbound station. "Where people live can affect how well, or even how long they live." This made me think about my health and life. I’ve had a rough time with my health since moving here. First, an abusive relationship, numerous doctor’s visits and a procedure, depression, anxiety, mold growing in the walls of my current apartment, numerous tests to figure out why I’m have these allergy-like symptoms. I live in a city; of course it’s going to be harder on my health than living in the country. Throw in the mass of people I come in contact with on public transportation, no wonder I’m sick and having a hard time. Granted, I know this PSA is talking about rent control (or lack of it), urbanization, how families can’t afford food b/c of the high rent, etc. But it still got me thinking about my life and health. I pay 64% of my monthly take home pay to live where I live. So instead of exploring the city and foreign lands, I’m stressing over how the hell I’m going to be able to buy Christmas presents for the babies or do the things I moved to Boston to do (Football games for example). I’m not complaining by any means, but I feel like I lost myself, lost the fire…the reason I moved to Boston to begin with. I moved to Boston for Tom Brady and the Patriots. Hands down, number one reason I ever set foot in Boston. I also came here b/c I wanted winter weather. Granted, Denver could provide this for me as well, but they don't have the Patriots... just the snow. I came here to meet boys with Boston accents, and yet I've failed at that. Just like I've failed to find a boy who actually enjoys sports more than I do (and that's not hard to do considering a 13 year old was pulling facts out left and right at Sunday’s game). I moved here to enjoy football, the snow, and everything Boston has to offer. Instead, I’m burning out, stuck in this routine, which is making me unhappy. So, now it’s time to change and get back to the old me… the part of me who put myself out there when I knew only 2 people in this city, who did stuff on my own because I refused to sit and not do something I wanted just because I had no one to do it with. I need to get out there and meet new people, even if that means signing myself up for a bowling team where I don’t know any of the teammates…because, I didn’t move to Boston to be comfortable. I moved to Boston because it was something new, exciting and an adventure for me. Now that I’ve put this out in the universe, lets see what actually happens.

Sick Day

Today I took my first sick day. My doctor called at 7:40 this morning, then I took some NyQuil before going back to bed, sleeping until noon. The nice thing about being sick on the first Monday of the month: free Red Box rentals. So today I hung out on my couch and watched "Get Him to the Greek", " How to Train Your Dragon" and "Iron Man 2". Of course, I spent some time outdoors walking to and from the store, and was able to enjoy the fall leaves in my neighborhood. Goodbye Indian Summer (aka Fall) and hello winter. It was frigid out today, gloves are out and its time to switch out my summer clothes with my winter layers. The heat kicked on pretty much all day long so I was glad I didn't have to be outside too long. It's going to be hard to get myself out of the house tomorrow for work. Going to have to start wearing my gloves and hats and winter coats I think, another low 30s morning tomorrow. This yucky cold is going around the office, and I am sure doing some of the things I did this weekend, didn't help my recovery, so this sick day was definitely needed. It was weird not being at work today. It made me remember my traveling days, when I would sit inside all day long if I wasn't out discovering new cities. I am thankful for having a job now, and getting paid sick days. It still doesn't feel real to me. Any who, planning on taking it easy this week, so I am well enough to travel next week. Happy November 1st!